Saw this while walking along Rue Saint-Paul at Quebec City, en route to our late lunch at Cafe du Monde. This was, at first, just eye-catching. And then I realized the clown was sad. Made me think of a couple of songs:
Sammy Davis Jr.’s (and then later on Regine Velasquez had her rendition) What Kind of Fool Am I
And, somehow of the same meaning, Send in the Clowns, which Regine also sang her own version of.
Such nice songs with sad messages.
I still know the lyrics written on my old Fisher Price music box. The thought of its tune brings back good childhood memories. I would wind up the music box again and again, hum or sing along.
Whenever I feel afraid I hold my head erect
And whistle a happy tune, So no one will suspect I’m afraid
I guess the words stuck to my head, along with walls I built through the years. Growing up I’ve mastered being calm, sometimes too much that I am perceived as unconcerned, transactional. Even though deep inside I feel like crumbling.
Until fate shattered these walls and reminded me of the beauty in humility and the refuge I can find in prayer. It was not an easy path, with fear lurking every so often. When this happens now, I say out loud, again and again:
My faith is stronger than my fear.
And then, slowly afterwards, I would feel a sense of peace. Always.